1 00:00:01,235 --> 00:00:04,038 Previously on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend... Oh, my God, 2 00:00:04,072 --> 00:00:05,206 this is everything I've ever wanted. 3 00:00:05,239 --> 00:00:06,707 Will... you... 4 00:00:06,740 --> 00:00:07,475 Wait! 5 00:00:07,508 --> 00:00:08,242 ...marry... 6 00:00:08,276 --> 00:00:09,043 Please! 7 00:00:09,077 --> 00:00:09,577 ...me? 8 00:00:09,610 --> 00:00:10,811 Yes! 9 00:00:10,844 --> 00:00:12,146 No! 10 00:00:13,214 --> 00:00:14,014 I had sex with Tanya. 11 00:00:14,048 --> 00:00:16,084 I promise it will never happen again. 12 00:00:16,117 --> 00:00:18,786 You don't live here anymore. 13 00:00:18,819 --> 00:00:20,488 PAULA: You have been 14 00:00:20,521 --> 00:00:21,689 such a great friend. Like a best friend. 15 00:00:21,722 --> 00:00:25,093 You can say it. Just say it. Please? 16 00:00:25,126 --> 00:00:27,195 DARRYL: This is Nathaniel Plimpton, the new owner 17 00:00:27,228 --> 00:00:28,096 of the firm. 18 00:00:28,129 --> 00:00:29,363 What's that guy's name? 19 00:00:29,397 --> 00:00:30,531 Glenn? Gene. 20 00:00:30,564 --> 00:00:31,532 It's George. 21 00:00:31,565 --> 00:00:33,634 It's weird how good-looking he is. 22 00:00:33,667 --> 00:00:37,538 You are everything I moved across country to get away from. 23 00:00:37,571 --> 00:00:39,140 You're the one who put this place on our radar. 24 00:00:39,173 --> 00:00:40,508 It's your fault that I'm here. 25 00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:41,575 Yay for me. 26 00:00:42,576 --> 00:00:44,178 * 27 00:00:48,449 --> 00:00:49,483 Oh. 28 00:00:50,518 --> 00:00:52,420 Gosh. 29 00:00:52,453 --> 00:00:53,121 What was that? 30 00:00:53,154 --> 00:00:55,289 Didn't you read the forecast? 31 00:00:55,323 --> 00:00:57,458 The Santa Ana winds are coming. 32 00:00:57,491 --> 00:00:59,560 The Devil Winds. Oh, I hate them. 33 00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:02,463 They ruin my eyelash extensions. 34 00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:06,267 I have eyelash-specific alopecia; you know that. 35 00:01:06,300 --> 00:01:07,468 Karen, we are talking about 36 00:01:07,501 --> 00:01:08,736 something important over here, okay? 37 00:01:08,769 --> 00:01:10,438 Just focus... 38 00:01:10,471 --> 00:01:12,573 on my ring! 39 00:01:12,606 --> 00:01:15,443 Look at my ring, guys! (squeals happily) 40 00:01:15,476 --> 00:01:18,279 I have a ring! A ring! See? 41 00:01:18,312 --> 00:01:19,713 Uh, see? 42 00:01:19,747 --> 00:01:21,315 Uh, see? 43 00:01:21,349 --> 00:01:22,383 Uh, see? 44 00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:24,318 It's a priceless family heirloom. 45 00:01:24,352 --> 00:01:25,819 He didn't buy you a ring? 46 00:01:25,853 --> 00:01:27,855 Yeah, he did buy it for me; he bought it back 47 00:01:27,888 --> 00:01:29,657 from the pawn shop that I sold it to, 48 00:01:29,690 --> 00:01:32,460 which is so sweet, 'cause he knew how much it meant to me. 49 00:01:32,493 --> 00:01:34,328 Well, I mean, if it meant that much to you, 50 00:01:34,362 --> 00:01:35,396 you probably wouldn't have pawned it. 51 00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:38,199 (muffled mumble) Shh. 52 00:01:38,232 --> 00:01:40,601 Look how good my ring looks on someone's face. 53 00:01:43,504 --> 00:01:45,806 * I'm just a girl in love 54 00:01:45,839 --> 00:01:47,708 * La-la-la, lovey-dove * 55 00:01:47,741 --> 00:01:50,678 * I can't be held responsible for my actions * 56 00:01:50,711 --> 00:01:52,146 * She's an ingenue * 57 00:01:52,180 --> 00:01:54,182 * I have no underlying issues to address * 58 00:01:54,215 --> 00:01:56,717 * I'm certifiably cute and adorably obsessed * 59 00:01:56,750 --> 00:01:58,586 * They say love makes you crazy * 60 00:01:58,619 --> 00:02:00,821 * Therefore, you can't call her crazy * 61 00:02:00,854 --> 00:02:02,890 * 'Cause when you call her crazy * 62 00:02:02,923 --> 00:02:05,226 * You're just calling her in love. * 63 00:02:05,259 --> 00:02:07,228 Blam! 64 00:02:10,864 --> 00:02:13,234 I mean, you guys got engaged so fast. 65 00:02:13,267 --> 00:02:14,502 But I think 66 00:02:14,535 --> 00:02:17,171 if you know, why wait, right? Exactly. 67 00:02:17,205 --> 00:02:19,507 Maybe because making a permanent commitment to someone 68 00:02:19,540 --> 00:02:21,275 is not to be taken lightly. 69 00:02:21,309 --> 00:02:23,411 Wow, so this is our thing now; you just say insulting things 70 00:02:23,444 --> 00:02:25,413 in a calm voice, and I'm supposed to take it. Awesome. 71 00:02:25,446 --> 00:02:27,948 To be fair, Mrs. H, Josh and Rebecca 72 00:02:27,981 --> 00:02:30,284 have known each other since they were 16, 73 00:02:30,318 --> 00:02:32,453 and they've been through a lot this last year, so... 74 00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:34,455 Thank you, Matron of Honor. 75 00:02:34,488 --> 00:02:36,290 See, that's how you read a room. 76 00:02:36,324 --> 00:02:37,825 Don't condescend to me, little girl. 77 00:02:37,858 --> 00:02:38,926 (mocking gibberish) 78 00:02:38,959 --> 00:02:39,993 Listen, guys, 79 00:02:40,027 --> 00:02:42,363 I know it seems like the proposal came very quickly, 80 00:02:42,396 --> 00:02:43,797 but we haven't even set a date yet. 81 00:02:43,831 --> 00:02:44,932 Good for you. 82 00:02:44,965 --> 00:02:47,801 You know, I have been engaged to someone for 12 years. 83 00:02:47,835 --> 00:02:48,702 Yeah, 84 00:02:48,736 --> 00:02:49,970 he's doing a life sentence 85 00:02:50,003 --> 00:02:51,805 in San Quentin, so... 86 00:02:51,839 --> 00:02:53,741 NATHANIEL: What is going on in here? 87 00:02:53,774 --> 00:02:55,209 Are you guys trying to decide 88 00:02:55,243 --> 00:02:56,810 if a dead spider's a black widow again? 89 00:02:56,844 --> 00:02:58,779 That was a productive Wednesday afternoon. 90 00:02:58,812 --> 00:03:00,414 Hello, "Nathan-ay-el." 91 00:03:00,448 --> 00:03:01,649 How are you? What's new with you? 92 00:03:01,682 --> 00:03:03,417 I don't care. I just got "en-gahged"! 93 00:03:03,451 --> 00:03:05,419 Is that why you look halfway decent? 94 00:03:05,453 --> 00:03:06,787 'Cause usually you look like 95 00:03:06,820 --> 00:03:09,490 what librarians look like in real life. 96 00:03:09,523 --> 00:03:12,960 Thank you. I loved Miss Patty and her squishy tummy. 97 00:03:12,993 --> 00:03:14,695 Well, condolences on the engagement. 98 00:03:14,728 --> 00:03:16,964 Shackled to one person for eternity. 99 00:03:16,997 --> 00:03:18,499 So boring. 100 00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:20,701 The pursuit is the fun. 101 00:03:20,734 --> 00:03:22,736 We're hunters by nature. 102 00:03:22,770 --> 00:03:26,540 When I'm chasing a client, I'm on them 24/7. 103 00:03:26,574 --> 00:03:27,741 But once I sign them, it's like, 104 00:03:27,775 --> 00:03:29,377 (chuckles) "Quit calling me all the time. 105 00:03:29,410 --> 00:03:31,345 Nobody likes a needy whore." 106 00:03:33,347 --> 00:03:35,649 Who wants to talk budgets? 107 00:03:39,820 --> 00:03:42,590 Ah. This must be such a romantic time 108 00:03:42,623 --> 00:03:43,724 for you and Josh. 109 00:03:43,757 --> 00:03:44,825 I bet you're just... 110 00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:47,861 doing it all the time now, like newly engaged bunnies. 111 00:03:47,895 --> 00:03:49,430 Yeah. 112 00:03:49,463 --> 00:03:51,365 Yeah. It's kind of hard to walk most days. 113 00:03:51,399 --> 00:03:52,666 (gasps) Oh, yeah. 114 00:03:52,700 --> 00:03:54,302 Feels like the carrot's still in the dip, 115 00:03:54,335 --> 00:03:55,436 if you know what I'm saying. 116 00:03:55,469 --> 00:03:56,737 (chuckles): Yeah. 117 00:03:56,770 --> 00:03:58,572 Ew. But yeah. 118 00:03:58,606 --> 00:04:00,441 Yeah. Yeah. 119 00:04:00,474 --> 00:04:01,742 So every time Josh touches you, 120 00:04:01,775 --> 00:04:03,477 it's like total goose bumps, right? 121 00:04:03,511 --> 00:04:05,746 Uh, yeah. 122 00:04:05,779 --> 00:04:07,315 Yeah. Oh, my God. 123 00:04:07,348 --> 00:04:09,350 He, like... kisses my neck, 124 00:04:09,383 --> 00:04:11,519 and it's totally goose bump city. 125 00:04:11,552 --> 00:04:13,787 Like, my skin looks like a cold, raw chicken. 126 00:04:13,821 --> 00:04:16,056 (moans) Oh, I remember that 127 00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:18,359 with Scott-- once upon a time. 128 00:04:18,392 --> 00:04:19,793 Yeah, what's going on with you guys? 129 00:04:19,827 --> 00:04:22,563 You know, I mean, we're barely talking, and... 130 00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:25,566 we just exchange the children like political prisoners 131 00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:27,901 at a militarized border, but... 132 00:04:27,935 --> 00:04:29,637 I find myself, 133 00:04:29,670 --> 00:04:32,706 sometimes, looking at old photos of us 134 00:04:32,740 --> 00:04:34,908 and... getting teary missing him, 135 00:04:34,942 --> 00:04:36,944 like a pathetic loser. 136 00:04:36,977 --> 00:04:38,946 Have you thought about calling him and telling him that? 137 00:04:38,979 --> 00:04:40,514 No! 138 00:04:40,548 --> 00:04:42,583 He cheated on me. 139 00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:46,053 He cheat-- and I, you know, I have my pride. 140 00:04:46,086 --> 00:04:48,922 I don't want people thinking I'm a doormat. 141 00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:49,890 No one would think that. 142 00:04:49,923 --> 00:04:51,058 (chuckles) 143 00:04:51,091 --> 00:04:53,661 Whatever you decide, whatever happens, 144 00:04:53,694 --> 00:04:56,664 it'll work out great, because you're smart and amazing. 145 00:04:56,697 --> 00:04:57,798 Oh, thanks, babe. 146 00:04:57,831 --> 00:04:59,500 (whispers): Okay. 147 00:05:03,036 --> 00:05:04,572 Geez! I for one 148 00:05:04,605 --> 00:05:06,006 definitely don't think you're a doormat. 149 00:05:06,039 --> 00:05:07,675 Darryl, have you been eavesdropping again? 150 00:05:07,708 --> 00:05:09,009 Because we talked about that. 151 00:05:09,042 --> 00:05:09,977 I wasn't eavesdropping. 152 00:05:10,010 --> 00:05:12,746 I was actually listening actively from afar. 153 00:05:12,780 --> 00:05:13,781 Wh... 154 00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:14,782 Because I care! 155 00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:17,084 Look, Paula, 156 00:05:17,117 --> 00:05:20,488 I also experienced a humiliating infidelity. 157 00:05:20,521 --> 00:05:21,722 I don't... 158 00:05:21,755 --> 00:05:23,891 And I know what it feels like to know 159 00:05:23,924 --> 00:05:25,393 that your spouse's genitals 160 00:05:25,426 --> 00:05:27,695 are taking a little stroll around the block. 161 00:05:27,728 --> 00:05:31,432 But I can be a good sounding board for you. 162 00:05:31,465 --> 00:05:32,966 Can help you feel better. 163 00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:33,767 No, thanks. 164 00:05:33,801 --> 00:05:37,505 You just made me feel worse and... 165 00:05:37,538 --> 00:05:39,339 a little nauseous, so... 166 00:05:42,075 --> 00:05:43,977 I can do better. 167 00:05:47,147 --> 00:05:50,651 There must be some sort of light to get this thing to sparkle. 168 00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:52,019 Huh. It's duller than 169 00:05:52,052 --> 00:05:53,987 Audra Levine's annual Yom Kippur letter. 170 00:05:54,021 --> 00:05:57,591 Hey, the kids are really excited about us getting married. 171 00:05:57,625 --> 00:06:00,494 Well, they thought I was 17 at first, so they were shocked. 172 00:06:00,528 --> 00:06:01,995 Becks, 173 00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:04,432 I'm really grateful to you for inspiring me 174 00:06:04,465 --> 00:06:06,467 to volunteer at the church. 175 00:06:06,500 --> 00:06:07,735 You know, you got way more 176 00:06:07,768 --> 00:06:09,837 out of that Scarsdale bar mitzvah than I did. 177 00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:13,574 It made me realize how much I like all that spiritual stuff. 178 00:06:13,607 --> 00:06:14,908 Like basketball? 179 00:06:14,942 --> 00:06:16,410 Church basketball. 180 00:06:16,444 --> 00:06:18,145 At a church. (chuckles) Hilarious. 181 00:06:18,178 --> 00:06:19,279 Hey, come here. 182 00:06:19,312 --> 00:06:23,050 Okay, check out this gorgeous wedding venue in Malibu. 183 00:06:23,083 --> 00:06:24,585 Isn't it amazing? 184 00:06:24,618 --> 00:06:26,987 Hey, folks, Gavin Johnson here with some bad news. 185 00:06:27,020 --> 00:06:29,990 Looks like we still have that pesky wind advisory in effect. 186 00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:31,959 Yep, those Santa Anas are coming in, 187 00:06:31,992 --> 00:06:34,762 gusting up to 35 miles per hour. (exhales sharply) 188 00:06:34,795 --> 00:06:35,896 What? 189 00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:36,964 So, be careful out there. 190 00:06:36,997 --> 00:06:38,766 REBECCA: Ugh. Not this. This. 191 00:06:38,799 --> 00:06:40,501 If we get married here, 192 00:06:40,534 --> 00:06:41,902 dig a hole next to the chuppah, 193 00:06:41,935 --> 00:06:43,504 because I will literally drop dead. (laughs) 194 00:06:43,537 --> 00:06:45,806 JOSH: Wow. I mean, it's pretty great. 195 00:06:45,839 --> 00:06:47,074 Isn't it? It's so beautiful, 196 00:06:47,107 --> 00:06:48,509 and they film movies here. 197 00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:49,543 Really? 198 00:06:49,577 --> 00:06:50,578 Wait a minute. 199 00:06:50,611 --> 00:06:52,913 This is where they filmed the Catalina wine mixer 200 00:06:52,946 --> 00:06:54,682 in Step Brothers right? 201 00:06:54,715 --> 00:06:55,916 I-I have no idea. 202 00:06:55,949 --> 00:06:57,851 God, I love that movie. You know, I'm in. 203 00:06:57,885 --> 00:06:59,052 We should totally have our wedding there. 204 00:06:59,086 --> 00:07:02,656 Oh, my God. Um, okay, let me check the wedding calendar. 205 00:07:02,690 --> 00:07:03,991 Come on, baby, come on. Mm-hmm. 206 00:07:04,024 --> 00:07:05,526 Oh, no. 207 00:07:05,559 --> 00:07:08,796 They are booked solid for the next two years. 208 00:07:08,829 --> 00:07:10,197 Aw, bummer. 209 00:07:10,230 --> 00:07:13,133 Well, we both love it, and we're not in a rush, right? 210 00:07:13,166 --> 00:07:15,669 What's two years when we're gonna be married forever? 211 00:07:15,703 --> 00:07:18,205 Exactly. Perfect. 212 00:07:18,238 --> 00:07:20,674 Okay, I will put our name on-on the waiting list? 213 00:07:20,708 --> 00:07:22,943 Great idea. O-Okay. Oh. 214 00:07:22,976 --> 00:07:24,645 You know what? This... 215 00:07:24,678 --> 00:07:26,213 I'm so happy. 216 00:07:26,246 --> 00:07:29,550 Oh, we're crushing this fiancée thing. 217 00:07:29,583 --> 00:07:32,953 And now we're gonna be "en-gahged" for two years. 218 00:07:32,986 --> 00:07:34,588 Mmm. 219 00:07:34,622 --> 00:07:35,956 (both moaning) 220 00:07:35,989 --> 00:07:37,991 (wind whistling) 221 00:07:39,693 --> 00:07:41,161 No goose bumps? 222 00:07:41,194 --> 00:07:42,696 What? 223 00:07:42,730 --> 00:07:43,764 Nothing. 224 00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:45,699 You just said, "Huh?" 225 00:07:45,733 --> 00:07:47,267 and then muttered something? 226 00:07:47,300 --> 00:07:48,602 No, I didn't. 227 00:07:48,636 --> 00:07:50,270 Hey, just kiss this part of my neck? 228 00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:52,139 Just kiss the part of my neck. Yeah. 229 00:07:52,172 --> 00:07:54,174 Yeah? Okay. Try the clavicle. 230 00:07:54,207 --> 00:07:55,576 This is the...? It's this. 231 00:07:55,609 --> 00:07:57,244 The bone. Okay. Just anywhere there. 232 00:07:57,277 --> 00:07:59,713 Décolletage. Yeah. (moaning) 233 00:07:59,747 --> 00:08:01,248 Yeah. Is that what you want? 234 00:08:01,281 --> 00:08:03,784 Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's totally hot. 235 00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:06,086 Lobes. Just go up to the lobes. Try the lobes. 236 00:08:06,119 --> 00:08:07,988 (sighs) 237 00:08:10,290 --> 00:08:11,959 I'm sorry. 238 00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:13,994 I'm in a weird mood today. 239 00:08:14,027 --> 00:08:16,096 Um... I apologize. I don't know... 240 00:08:16,129 --> 00:08:17,865 I don't know what's wrong with me. 241 00:08:17,898 --> 00:08:20,267 (chuckles): Wait, wait, d-don't be sorry. 242 00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:22,603 It's probably just the weather. 243 00:08:22,636 --> 00:08:23,771 But we don't have weather here. 244 00:08:23,804 --> 00:08:24,805 We have the Santa Ana winds. 245 00:08:24,838 --> 00:08:27,841 Just like that weatherman said. They're the worst. 246 00:08:27,875 --> 00:08:29,643 They give me bad allergies. 247 00:08:29,677 --> 00:08:31,779 And people act weird during them, too. 248 00:08:31,812 --> 00:08:34,014 They call them the Devil Winds. 249 00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:36,083 Devil Winds? Yeah. 250 00:08:36,116 --> 00:08:38,218 The Devil Winds. 251 00:08:38,251 --> 00:08:41,188 (wind whistling) 252 00:08:41,221 --> 00:08:43,557 * 253 00:08:49,730 --> 00:08:51,632 Devil Winds. 254 00:08:51,665 --> 00:08:53,233 (horn beeps) 255 00:08:53,266 --> 00:08:54,802 * Whee 256 00:08:54,835 --> 00:08:57,137 * Ooh, ooh 257 00:08:57,170 --> 00:08:59,807 * Whee 258 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:03,744 * Hello there, it's me 259 00:09:03,777 --> 00:09:07,715 * I'm the Santa Ana winds 260 00:09:07,748 --> 00:09:11,318 * I cause allergies 261 00:09:11,351 --> 00:09:15,789 * I also make things weird 262 00:09:15,823 --> 00:09:16,957 * A little bit about me 263 00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:19,326 * I'm a hot, hot breeze 264 00:09:19,359 --> 00:09:23,030 * That originates from high-pressure air masses * 265 00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:25,198 * Technically, I'm known 266 00:09:25,232 --> 00:09:27,367 * As a katabatic wind 267 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:31,605 * That's science for "a pain in your asses" * 268 00:09:31,639 --> 00:09:35,008 * I'm mystical but also carry dangerous spores * 269 00:09:35,042 --> 00:09:38,278 * I bring whimsy and forest fires * 270 00:09:38,311 --> 00:09:42,015 * When I blow, there's magic in the air * 271 00:09:42,049 --> 00:09:46,353 * And a higher risk of suicide * 272 00:09:46,386 --> 00:09:50,090 * I make children wheeze 273 00:09:50,123 --> 00:09:53,360 * 'Cause I'm the Santa Ana winds * 274 00:09:53,393 --> 00:09:58,732 * To reiterate, I make things weird * 275 00:09:58,766 --> 00:10:01,735 * When I blow, it sounds like "whee!" * 276 00:10:01,769 --> 00:10:02,770 (wind whistling) 277 00:10:02,803 --> 00:10:03,971 * I'll be back 278 00:10:04,004 --> 00:10:05,939 * Because I'm the wind 279 00:10:05,973 --> 00:10:10,110 * And also kind of a narrator. * 280 00:10:10,143 --> 00:10:13,080 (people clamoring, horns honking) 281 00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:14,715 NATHANIEL: Okay, next order of business. 282 00:10:14,748 --> 00:10:16,316 I've been talking to some potential clients 283 00:10:16,349 --> 00:10:18,919 out of Brentwood who'd like to expand their businesses east... 284 00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:20,187 KAREN: Hold on 285 00:10:20,220 --> 00:10:22,122 to your panties; look at those winds. 286 00:10:22,155 --> 00:10:23,390 They're here. 287 00:10:23,423 --> 00:10:25,392 The Devil Winds are here. 288 00:10:25,425 --> 00:10:27,961 Can we all please try to get through a meeting 289 00:10:27,995 --> 00:10:29,329 without actively being embarrassing? 290 00:10:29,362 --> 00:10:31,832 Is that too much to ask? Karen? 291 00:10:31,865 --> 00:10:33,166 (Rebecca shrieks) 292 00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:35,869 (grunts) 293 00:10:35,903 --> 00:10:37,404 (wind howling) 294 00:10:37,437 --> 00:10:39,139 (gasps) 295 00:10:39,172 --> 00:10:39,673 Whoa! Whoa! 296 00:10:39,707 --> 00:10:42,275 Wow! Those are beauts! 297 00:10:42,309 --> 00:10:44,377 Okay, all right. 298 00:10:44,411 --> 00:10:46,013 Just, just, just, just... 299 00:10:46,046 --> 00:10:48,015 Ha, ha. Ha, ha. Okay. 300 00:10:48,048 --> 00:10:49,282 All right, show's over. 301 00:10:49,316 --> 00:10:51,118 Nothing to see here. 302 00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:59,292 (clears throat) 303 00:10:59,326 --> 00:11:01,128 Goose bumps. 304 00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,296 (sniffles, clears throat) 305 00:11:03,330 --> 00:11:07,034 Okay, Josh, I need you to give me goose bumps right now. 306 00:11:07,067 --> 00:11:09,069 * 307 00:11:12,272 --> 00:11:15,142 Damn you, winds of the devil. 308 00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:19,146 * Hey, it's me again 309 00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:22,916 * I'm the Santa Ana winds 310 00:11:22,950 --> 00:11:26,854 * Here's some magic dust 311 00:11:26,887 --> 00:11:31,491 * Which will make things weird. * 312 00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:32,893 (blows) 313 00:11:32,926 --> 00:11:34,928 (magical tinkling) 314 00:11:37,297 --> 00:11:39,299 (magical tinkling) 315 00:11:48,976 --> 00:11:50,243 (groans softly) 316 00:11:53,013 --> 00:11:54,882 NATHANIEL: The pursuit is the fun. 317 00:11:54,915 --> 00:11:56,817 We're hunters by nature. 318 00:11:56,850 --> 00:11:59,252 (echoing): The pursuit, the pursuit, the pursuit... 319 00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:04,524 Oh, Nathaniel. 320 00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:06,860 Oh, girl who works for me. 321 00:12:06,894 --> 00:12:08,328 (both moaning) 322 00:12:10,330 --> 00:12:12,332 (gasps) Oh, my God. 323 00:12:12,365 --> 00:12:13,500 Oh, my God! 324 00:12:13,533 --> 00:12:16,503 (breathing heavily) 325 00:12:16,536 --> 00:12:19,072 Ew. 326 00:12:19,106 --> 00:12:23,476 * They had the same dream 327 00:12:23,510 --> 00:12:26,513 * They just got Santa Ana winded. * 328 00:12:33,086 --> 00:12:36,523 I had the weirdest dream last night. You did? So did I. 329 00:12:36,556 --> 00:12:37,858 Oh, me, too. 330 00:12:37,891 --> 00:12:40,260 Oh. It's those damn Devil Winds. 331 00:12:40,293 --> 00:12:41,528 You know, I dreamt 332 00:12:41,561 --> 00:12:45,933 that I married my pet snake Long John Slither, which is crazy. 333 00:12:45,966 --> 00:12:48,101 That prop isn't even on the ballot yet. 334 00:12:48,135 --> 00:12:50,037 I actually had an amazing dream. 335 00:12:50,070 --> 00:12:51,939 It was George Washington, George Foreman, 336 00:12:51,972 --> 00:12:54,141 Boy George and myself-- we're all on a yacht. 337 00:12:54,174 --> 00:12:55,542 Which makes sense, right? 338 00:12:57,244 --> 00:12:58,946 'Cause my name is George. 339 00:12:58,979 --> 00:13:01,314 Oh, my God! What is wrong with you people? 340 00:13:01,348 --> 00:13:03,016 You're all a bunch of jerks! 341 00:13:04,484 --> 00:13:06,887 Okay, so, Karen, I'm totally freaking out, 342 00:13:06,920 --> 00:13:09,156 because you all had weird dreams, but mine was... 343 00:13:09,189 --> 00:13:10,824 mine was upsetting. 344 00:13:12,860 --> 00:13:15,095 Okay, so, I'm in a funeral home, 345 00:13:15,128 --> 00:13:17,164 and I walk up to a casket. 346 00:13:17,197 --> 00:13:20,133 And in the casket was Darryl... (Karen gasps) 347 00:13:20,167 --> 00:13:22,169 ...holding an oil painting of him and me. 348 00:13:23,904 --> 00:13:25,538 Oh, God, it's-it's been haunting me all morning. 349 00:13:25,572 --> 00:13:28,108 I mean, you know, you know when you have a dream, 350 00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:29,376 and it just feels so real? 351 00:13:29,409 --> 00:13:31,945 Damn those Devil Winds! 352 00:13:31,979 --> 00:13:34,414 I'm here. Stop talking about dumb stuff. 353 00:13:34,447 --> 00:13:37,017 Hey, we were just discussing the Devil Winds. 354 00:13:37,050 --> 00:13:39,352 Did you happen to have a weird dream last night? 355 00:13:39,386 --> 00:13:41,588 What? Why would you ask that? 356 00:13:41,621 --> 00:13:43,356 Because we've all had weird dreams, 357 00:13:43,390 --> 00:13:45,358 and we think it's because of the Devil Winds. 358 00:13:45,392 --> 00:13:47,160 Okay, I think we just, you know, 359 00:13:47,194 --> 00:13:49,196 dial it back on the Devil Winds, Karen. 360 00:13:50,097 --> 00:13:51,498 (gasps) You did have a dream. 361 00:13:51,531 --> 00:13:53,533 I see it. 362 00:13:53,566 --> 00:13:57,037 Your eyes have been touched by the... Winds of Diablo. 363 00:13:57,070 --> 00:13:58,438 Really? 364 00:13:58,471 --> 00:14:00,073 You know what? I did have a dream. 365 00:14:00,107 --> 00:14:02,342 I dreamt that I didn't work with morons. 366 00:14:02,375 --> 00:14:04,878 Well, you know what I wish I had a dream about? 367 00:14:04,912 --> 00:14:06,546 That my boss was kind. 368 00:14:07,414 --> 00:14:08,581 Run, Karen. 369 00:14:08,615 --> 00:14:10,650 (clears throat) 370 00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:12,485 You know, I'm so sorry about her. 371 00:14:12,519 --> 00:14:16,156 She just, um... Yeah. 372 00:14:18,058 --> 00:14:20,060 Hey! Hey. 373 00:14:20,093 --> 00:14:21,428 (clears throat) 374 00:14:22,595 --> 00:14:24,064 Oh, um, go ahead. 375 00:14:24,097 --> 00:14:25,332 No, you go. 376 00:14:25,365 --> 00:14:26,666 I'll-I'll just... I'll wait and stir. 377 00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:29,069 You're gonna stir before you put in the creamer? 378 00:14:29,102 --> 00:14:31,905 Yeah. I like to saturate the wood. 379 00:14:32,940 --> 00:14:34,574 (moans softly) 380 00:14:37,110 --> 00:14:39,212 Here you go. 381 00:14:39,246 --> 00:14:40,247 Thanks. 382 00:14:44,251 --> 00:14:46,053 Hmm? 383 00:14:49,289 --> 00:14:51,524 Damn it. Goose bumps. 384 00:14:52,525 --> 00:14:54,127 (sighs) 385 00:14:55,528 --> 00:14:57,464 (Darryl humming) 386 00:14:57,497 --> 00:14:58,465 Hey, Darryl? 387 00:14:58,498 --> 00:14:59,599 Hmm? 388 00:14:59,632 --> 00:15:01,168 I was thinking. 389 00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:04,104 I know sometimes I get impatient 390 00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:06,173 with you, and I'm 391 00:15:06,206 --> 00:15:07,640 sorry about that. 392 00:15:07,674 --> 00:15:10,277 And I just... you know, I want you to know 393 00:15:10,310 --> 00:15:13,113 that I value our friendship. 394 00:15:13,146 --> 00:15:15,115 And, you know, if you wanted 395 00:15:15,148 --> 00:15:17,384 to pose for an oil painting together sometime, 396 00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,652 that I would be fine with that. 397 00:15:19,686 --> 00:15:22,956 Really? 'Cause I was thinking about charcoal or a gouache. 398 00:15:22,990 --> 00:15:24,091 What? But an oil painting-- 399 00:15:24,124 --> 00:15:27,694 that means that we would spend more time together, so... 400 00:15:27,727 --> 00:15:29,529 Wait a second. 401 00:15:29,562 --> 00:15:31,531 What's going on? 402 00:15:31,564 --> 00:15:33,133 Why are you being so nice? 403 00:15:33,166 --> 00:15:34,534 This isn't one of your secret tricks, 404 00:15:34,567 --> 00:15:36,269 like the other time where you told me 405 00:15:36,303 --> 00:15:38,038 that there was ice cream in the bathroom? 406 00:15:38,071 --> 00:15:39,539 No. 407 00:15:39,572 --> 00:15:41,274 (laughing): That's really funny, though. 408 00:15:41,308 --> 00:15:43,210 Come on. Anyway, 409 00:15:43,243 --> 00:15:45,678 just, I wanted to let you know that I appreciate you, 410 00:15:45,712 --> 00:15:48,248 and, you know, the... blah. 411 00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:52,619 Wait a second, Paula. Uh... 412 00:15:52,652 --> 00:15:55,622 What would you think about maybe hanging out after work tonight? 413 00:15:55,655 --> 00:15:58,158 Maybe grab a bite, just to catch up? 414 00:15:58,191 --> 00:15:59,426 Uh... 415 00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:02,462 Okay. No, no. No. That's fine. I get it. 416 00:16:02,495 --> 00:16:04,064 That's totally cool. No, no, no. 417 00:16:04,097 --> 00:16:05,465 Hey, you know what? Fine. 418 00:16:05,498 --> 00:16:07,400 Let's do it. Let's-let's grab a bite. 419 00:16:07,434 --> 00:16:09,102 Oh, God, that would be great! 420 00:16:09,136 --> 00:16:11,538 No, there's this restaurant that I wanted to try, so we could... 421 00:16:11,571 --> 00:16:13,973 Yeah. No, no, no. Whatever. Whatever you want. 422 00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:18,145 (singsongy): Going to dinner with Paula. 423 00:16:18,178 --> 00:16:20,013 NBD. You know, casual thing. 424 00:16:20,047 --> 00:16:22,382 Best friend thing. (laughs) 425 00:16:22,415 --> 00:16:24,317 Can you believe it, Gus? 426 00:16:24,351 --> 00:16:25,318 (grunts) 427 00:16:25,352 --> 00:16:26,486 It's George! 428 00:16:26,519 --> 00:16:28,055 Hey, Paula? 429 00:16:28,088 --> 00:16:29,589 (sighs) 430 00:16:29,622 --> 00:16:31,424 Okay. Code yellow. Oh. 431 00:16:32,825 --> 00:16:33,893 What? What is this? What are you doing? 432 00:16:33,926 --> 00:16:36,696 I'm sorry. I threw away that color chart you gave me. 433 00:16:36,729 --> 00:16:39,399 Oh, my God! Periods are code blue, because blue is the color 434 00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:41,134 of the liquid they use in tampon commercials, 435 00:16:41,168 --> 00:16:42,369 because men hate that women bleed. 436 00:16:42,402 --> 00:16:44,737 Right. No. Code yellow is man problems. 437 00:16:44,771 --> 00:16:46,706 (gasps) Hidey hole. 438 00:16:49,442 --> 00:16:52,045 Okay, so I had a graphic dream about Nathaniel last night, 439 00:16:52,079 --> 00:16:53,613 and now he's giving me goose bumps. 440 00:16:53,646 --> 00:16:55,215 Seriously? Yeah. 441 00:16:55,248 --> 00:16:56,749 It's all up and down my lady limbs. 442 00:16:56,783 --> 00:16:59,252 And I'm planning a wedding to the man of my dreams. 443 00:16:59,286 --> 00:17:00,387 Is this bad? 444 00:17:00,420 --> 00:17:01,688 Uh, well... 445 00:17:01,721 --> 00:17:03,623 Paula, Josh doesn't give me goose bumps anymore. 446 00:17:03,656 --> 00:17:05,158 I don't know what's happening. 447 00:17:05,192 --> 00:17:07,460 I'm "im-bump-otent" with him right now. 448 00:17:07,494 --> 00:17:08,795 I'm just, I'm freaking out. 449 00:17:08,828 --> 00:17:11,364 Oh, honey. 450 00:17:12,665 --> 00:17:15,135 That's gonna pass. 451 00:17:15,168 --> 00:17:17,337 God, remember when I had, like, major goose bumps 452 00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:19,839 for that client, Calvin, and then I saw him cry, 453 00:17:19,872 --> 00:17:21,541 and yuck, it was just, it was over? 454 00:17:21,574 --> 00:17:23,810 So, I mean, that-- you just have to wait for that moment. 455 00:17:23,843 --> 00:17:26,346 You just have to wait for him to whip his yuck out. 456 00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:27,614 Okay, I can do that. Yeah. 457 00:17:27,647 --> 00:17:30,217 I mean, I bet... bet he has a big yuck, like a massive yuck. 458 00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:31,851 I mean, I wonder if I could even take that yuck. 459 00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:33,153 Oh, wow. Okay. 460 00:17:33,186 --> 00:17:34,521 Uh, change of plans. 461 00:17:34,554 --> 00:17:37,324 You need to stay away from him as much as possible. 462 00:17:37,357 --> 00:17:39,126 And whatever you do, 463 00:17:39,159 --> 00:17:41,561 do not get stuck in a small space with Nathaniel. 464 00:17:41,594 --> 00:17:43,096 Wait, why would I do that? 465 00:17:43,130 --> 00:17:44,731 I mean, you know, you wouldn't mean to, 466 00:17:44,764 --> 00:17:46,766 but that is exactly what happens in romcoms. 467 00:17:46,799 --> 00:17:48,668 Okay, good-looking people who hate each other 468 00:17:48,701 --> 00:17:50,537 but secretly have the hots for each other-- 469 00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:53,506 I mean, they are always getting stuck in snowy cabins 470 00:17:53,540 --> 00:17:56,443 and bank vaults and the trunk of a car. 471 00:17:57,577 --> 00:17:58,711 I mean, it has happened to 472 00:17:58,745 --> 00:18:00,280 Reese Witherspoon, like, eight times. 473 00:18:00,313 --> 00:18:03,850 Okay, so all I need to do is just avoid Nathaniel. 474 00:18:03,883 --> 00:18:06,219 Right. I can do that. Okay. 475 00:18:06,253 --> 00:18:08,355 All right, I can do that. 476 00:18:19,632 --> 00:18:20,633 There would be... 477 00:18:24,337 --> 00:18:26,239 On article seven-- what do you think that means? 478 00:18:32,612 --> 00:18:35,348 Coast is clear. 479 00:18:35,382 --> 00:18:36,483 (elevator bell dings) 480 00:18:36,516 --> 00:18:38,218 (whistling) 481 00:18:43,423 --> 00:18:45,525 * 482 00:18:54,667 --> 00:18:58,205 * You might say, "Don't do it, wind * 483 00:18:58,238 --> 00:19:02,175 * Leave these poor people alone" * 484 00:19:02,209 --> 00:19:06,813 * But I'm a prankster 485 00:19:06,846 --> 00:19:10,683 * Tee-hee-hee-hee 486 00:19:10,717 --> 00:19:13,620 * I just wanna see 487 00:19:13,653 --> 00:19:16,756 * What will happen. 488 00:19:16,789 --> 00:19:18,425 (electrical buzzing, crackling) 489 00:19:18,458 --> 00:19:19,759 (elevator rumbles) 490 00:19:19,792 --> 00:19:21,361 Whoa! 491 00:19:21,394 --> 00:19:22,862 Oh, no. 492 00:19:34,674 --> 00:19:36,543 Thank you. Thanks. 493 00:19:36,576 --> 00:19:37,810 This place is a fortune. 494 00:19:37,844 --> 00:19:38,978 You're my best friend, 495 00:19:39,011 --> 00:19:40,880 and my best friend deserves a special meal. 496 00:19:40,913 --> 00:19:42,682 Best friend. Mm-hmm. Cheers. 497 00:19:42,715 --> 00:19:43,683 Cheers. 498 00:19:43,716 --> 00:19:44,784 (both chuckle) 499 00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:48,788 Oh, that's good. 500 00:19:48,821 --> 00:19:50,823 You know, it's funny that you picked this place. 501 00:19:50,857 --> 00:19:52,692 It's right near Scott's new apartment. 502 00:19:52,725 --> 00:19:53,793 Oh. 503 00:19:53,826 --> 00:19:54,961 Yeah, when I drop the kids off, 504 00:19:54,994 --> 00:19:57,830 sometimes I think, you know, if we were still together, 505 00:19:57,864 --> 00:20:00,833 and I had a million dollars, we could eat here. 506 00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:01,968 (laughs) 507 00:20:02,001 --> 00:20:04,304 It's stupid. 508 00:20:04,337 --> 00:20:05,905 That's not stupid. 509 00:20:05,938 --> 00:20:08,275 Why don't you just give him a call and tell him how you feel? 510 00:20:08,308 --> 00:20:09,576 (sighs) 511 00:20:09,609 --> 00:20:12,979 I mean, I want to, but I just, I can't. 512 00:20:13,012 --> 00:20:15,448 I can't. I have my pride. 513 00:20:15,482 --> 00:20:17,317 Paula, that is just silly. 514 00:20:17,350 --> 00:20:18,451 Can you cuddle pride? 515 00:20:18,485 --> 00:20:19,719 Can you take pride to the movies? 516 00:20:19,752 --> 00:20:22,855 Can pride pick a little piece of croissant out of your mustache? 517 00:20:22,889 --> 00:20:24,591 Mm. If you really miss him, 518 00:20:24,624 --> 00:20:27,260 it doesn't matter what other people say. 519 00:20:27,294 --> 00:20:29,996 Paula, Scott made a huge mistake, 520 00:20:30,029 --> 00:20:32,465 but he apologized right away. 521 00:20:32,499 --> 00:20:33,866 And you said yourself, you said 522 00:20:33,900 --> 00:20:35,468 you didn't think that he would cheat again. 523 00:20:35,502 --> 00:20:36,736 I mean, you didn't tell me that. 524 00:20:36,769 --> 00:20:37,604 You were talking to Mrs. Hernandez, 525 00:20:37,637 --> 00:20:40,473 and I was nearby. Maybe you're right. 526 00:20:40,507 --> 00:20:43,810 Maybe... I will give him another chance. 527 00:20:43,843 --> 00:20:45,612 I don't know. I will think about it. 528 00:20:45,645 --> 00:20:46,846 That's great. Okay. 529 00:20:46,879 --> 00:20:48,415 You think about it. 530 00:20:48,448 --> 00:20:49,982 While you're doing that, 531 00:20:50,016 --> 00:20:52,819 I'm gonna go... sprinkle the infield. 532 00:20:52,852 --> 00:20:54,020 I'll be right back. 533 00:20:54,053 --> 00:20:55,888 Okay. 534 00:20:55,922 --> 00:20:56,823 REBECCA (muffled): Help! 535 00:20:56,856 --> 00:20:59,426 Help! We're stuck! Hello! 536 00:20:59,459 --> 00:21:00,360 Uh, okay. 537 00:21:00,393 --> 00:21:02,595 Power must have gone out due to the winds. 538 00:21:02,629 --> 00:21:05,031 Ugh! There's no cell phone service in here. 539 00:21:05,064 --> 00:21:06,433 The alarm's busted, too. 540 00:21:06,466 --> 00:21:08,000 Oh, my God. We have to get out of here. 541 00:21:08,034 --> 00:21:09,402 How are we gonna get out of here? 542 00:21:09,436 --> 00:21:10,903 Just calm down. I am calm. 543 00:21:10,937 --> 00:21:12,805 I just can't be stuck in here, and I cannot 544 00:21:12,839 --> 00:21:14,574 be stuck in here with you. So just-just somebody! 545 00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:17,377 Somebody, help! Just get us out of here! 546 00:21:17,410 --> 00:21:19,912 REBECCA: Hello! Help! 547 00:21:19,946 --> 00:21:20,913 GEORGE: H-Hello? 548 00:21:20,947 --> 00:21:23,049 Oh. Hello? 549 00:21:23,082 --> 00:21:24,417 Who's in there? 550 00:21:24,451 --> 00:21:25,752 Oh. Hi. 551 00:21:25,785 --> 00:21:27,520 It's Rebecca Bunch and Nathaniel Plimpton. 552 00:21:27,554 --> 00:21:28,721 Can you help us? 553 00:21:28,755 --> 00:21:30,657 Sure. Of course. Yeah, absolutely. 554 00:21:30,690 --> 00:21:31,924 Thank you so much. 555 00:21:31,958 --> 00:21:33,726 Just as soon as you say my name. 556 00:21:34,927 --> 00:21:36,463 What? 557 00:21:36,496 --> 00:21:38,798 Just say my name, you know. Pronounce it correctly. 558 00:21:38,831 --> 00:21:40,800 And, uh, and I'll just let you both out. 559 00:21:40,833 --> 00:21:44,837 Oh, God, it's what's-his-name. 560 00:21:44,871 --> 00:21:46,539 Quick. What's his name? 561 00:21:46,573 --> 00:21:47,840 You think I know? 562 00:21:47,874 --> 00:21:49,542 You fired him and then rehired him. 563 00:21:49,576 --> 00:21:51,544 You worked with him for over a year. 564 00:21:51,578 --> 00:21:52,712 I've been busy. Okay. 565 00:21:52,745 --> 00:21:54,547 Okay, I don't know his name, 566 00:21:54,581 --> 00:21:55,948 but I do know exactly what he looks like. 567 00:21:55,982 --> 00:21:58,385 Please, sir. 568 00:21:59,586 --> 00:22:02,455 We're sorry, but we can't remember your name. 569 00:22:02,489 --> 00:22:05,458 I will, however, describe your face. 570 00:22:05,492 --> 00:22:07,960 (chuckles): No! No, no, no, no, no. 571 00:22:07,994 --> 00:22:12,131 I'm, uh, I'm not gonna stand for this-this disrespect anymore. 572 00:22:12,164 --> 00:22:15,735 Say... my... name. 573 00:22:15,768 --> 00:22:18,405 Oh, my God! If you wanted people to remember your name, 574 00:22:18,438 --> 00:22:20,440 then you should have made some kind of impression. 575 00:22:20,473 --> 00:22:22,141 All right? Now stop being such a whiner, 576 00:22:22,174 --> 00:22:23,643 and let us out! 577 00:22:23,676 --> 00:22:24,777 Dude, don't piss him off. 578 00:22:24,811 --> 00:22:26,379 He's our only way out of here. 579 00:22:26,413 --> 00:22:29,716 To be called by one's name is one of the rights 580 00:22:29,749 --> 00:22:32,552 George Washington fought for. 581 00:22:32,585 --> 00:22:33,920 Is his name Washington? 582 00:22:33,953 --> 00:22:36,389 I'm leaving for the weekend. 583 00:22:36,423 --> 00:22:38,858 And I hope you both enjoy one-on-one time 584 00:22:38,891 --> 00:22:40,393 in close quarters, 585 00:22:40,427 --> 00:22:42,595 'cause you're about to get a lot of it! 586 00:22:42,629 --> 00:22:45,832 How's that for an impression? 587 00:22:53,606 --> 00:22:55,041 Well, you made quite a point. 588 00:22:55,074 --> 00:22:56,643 Great. 589 00:22:56,676 --> 00:22:58,578 Now we're just stuck in here. 590 00:22:58,611 --> 00:22:59,746 You know what? 591 00:22:59,779 --> 00:23:01,080 I know what we should do. 592 00:23:01,113 --> 00:23:01,981 Okay. 593 00:23:02,014 --> 00:23:03,683 We should have sex. 594 00:23:04,651 --> 00:23:05,885 What? 595 00:23:05,918 --> 00:23:07,687 I know. I'm shocked, too. 596 00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:08,888 But hear me out. 597 00:23:08,921 --> 00:23:10,156 This is what I'm thinking. 598 00:23:11,991 --> 00:23:15,061 * 599 00:23:24,471 --> 00:23:27,807 * Unfortunately, I want to have sex with you * 600 00:23:29,709 --> 00:23:31,911 * I don't know what happened 601 00:23:31,944 --> 00:23:34,146 * Maybe you lost some weight 602 00:23:36,082 --> 00:23:40,186 * For some reason, you're now on the top of my to-do list * 603 00:23:40,219 --> 00:23:42,955 * Let's get this over with 604 00:23:42,989 --> 00:23:46,058 * So I can focus on other tasks * 605 00:23:46,092 --> 00:23:48,528 * Let's have intercourse 606 00:23:48,561 --> 00:23:50,096 * Let's have intercourse * 607 00:23:50,129 --> 00:23:52,164 * Just pretend I'm seducing you * 608 00:23:52,198 --> 00:23:53,833 * Come on, let's quickly have intercourse * 609 00:23:53,866 --> 00:23:55,802 * Let's quickly have intercourse * 610 00:23:55,835 --> 00:24:00,807 * So I can move on with my life * 611 00:24:02,842 --> 00:24:05,678 * My busy life 612 00:24:05,712 --> 00:24:08,014 * You and I 613 00:24:08,047 --> 00:24:12,251 * Are both highly intelligent people * 614 00:24:12,284 --> 00:24:17,657 * Although I'm in much better physical shape * 615 00:24:17,690 --> 00:24:20,660 * Once we do it, it'll be like 616 00:24:20,693 --> 00:24:22,695 * Well, that's what that was like * 617 00:24:22,729 --> 00:24:26,599 * And you'll hopefully go back 618 00:24:26,633 --> 00:24:28,735 * To seeming weird to me 619 00:24:28,768 --> 00:24:29,936 * But right now let's have intercourse * 620 00:24:29,969 --> 00:24:32,805 * Let's have intercourse * 621 00:24:32,839 --> 00:24:34,841 * I mean, obviously you want to, too * 622 00:24:34,874 --> 00:24:36,709 * Just super quickly have intercourse * 623 00:24:36,743 --> 00:24:38,110 * Super quickly have intercourse * 624 00:24:38,144 --> 00:24:41,981 * You could use the exercise 625 00:24:42,014 --> 00:24:43,783 * Sometimes my body wants things * 626 00:24:43,816 --> 00:24:45,251 * That my mind does not 627 00:24:45,284 --> 00:24:47,219 * My body wants things that make my mind go * 628 00:24:47,253 --> 00:24:48,655 * "Uh, body, what?" 629 00:24:48,688 --> 00:24:49,989 * We're animals 630 00:24:50,022 --> 00:24:51,591 * It's unfortunate 631 00:24:51,624 --> 00:24:54,260 * So come on, let's contortion it * 632 00:24:54,293 --> 00:24:56,829 * I won't be back to normal till I see * 633 00:24:56,863 --> 00:24:58,698 * What your nipples look like 634 00:24:58,731 --> 00:25:01,500 * They're probably straightforward nipples * 635 00:25:03,235 --> 00:25:05,304 * I won't know for sure 636 00:25:05,337 --> 00:25:07,874 * Until we stop wasting time talking 'bout it * 637 00:25:07,907 --> 00:25:09,976 * And we super quickly 638 00:25:10,009 --> 00:25:11,010 * It'll only take a second 639 00:25:11,043 --> 00:25:12,879 * Have intercourse 640 00:25:12,912 --> 00:25:14,146 * Let's have intercourse * 641 00:25:14,180 --> 00:25:17,116 * Good thing I happen to have an old condom * 642 00:25:17,149 --> 00:25:20,519 * In my wallet. 643 00:25:35,201 --> 00:25:38,337 REBECCA (muffled): No. No, no, no. 644 00:25:38,370 --> 00:25:40,673 No, no, no. You do not have my consent. 645 00:25:40,707 --> 00:25:42,609 What in the world would make you think 646 00:25:42,642 --> 00:25:43,943 that I would want to have 647 00:25:43,976 --> 00:25:46,245 hot, naked, sweaty elevator sex with you? 648 00:25:46,278 --> 00:25:50,316 I mean, the more I describe it, the more disgusting it sounds. 649 00:25:50,349 --> 00:25:51,651 Need I remind you, 650 00:25:51,684 --> 00:25:53,119 I'm "en-gahged." 651 00:25:53,152 --> 00:25:55,321 And right now, I am "out-rahged." 652 00:25:55,354 --> 00:25:57,824 You're doing the old-timey voice and I am still attracted. 653 00:25:57,857 --> 00:25:59,125 It is so confusing. 654 00:25:59,158 --> 00:26:02,261 Sir, please desist, okay? 655 00:26:02,294 --> 00:26:04,864 I am in a monogamous relationship. 656 00:26:04,897 --> 00:26:06,666 Yeah, which means you're bored, right? 657 00:26:06,699 --> 00:26:08,200 The chase is over, the sex is lame. 658 00:26:08,234 --> 00:26:09,235 We've all been there. 659 00:26:09,268 --> 00:26:12,004 Um, no. Actually, we have a lot of sex. Yeah. 660 00:26:12,038 --> 00:26:15,608 All day, "erryday," it's sexy sexy time. 661 00:26:15,642 --> 00:26:17,143 So what? I had sex with someone this morning. 662 00:26:17,176 --> 00:26:18,711 That has nothing to do with whether or not 663 00:26:18,745 --> 00:26:20,179 I want to have sex with you or not. 664 00:26:20,212 --> 00:26:23,282 Okay, Nathaniel, um, this is every kind of inappropriate. 665 00:26:23,315 --> 00:26:24,884 Listen, um, 666 00:26:24,917 --> 00:26:26,886 instead of, uh, having sex, why don't we just 667 00:26:26,919 --> 00:26:29,188 get to know each other in a platonic way. 668 00:26:29,221 --> 00:26:30,189 Mm. Okay? I'll start. 669 00:26:30,222 --> 00:26:31,724 Hi. I'm Rebecca Bunch. 670 00:26:31,758 --> 00:26:33,325 I'm from Scarsdale. I'm an Aries-Taurus cusper, 671 00:26:33,359 --> 00:26:34,761 and I'm a Ravenclaw. 672 00:26:34,794 --> 00:26:36,028 (scoffs) 673 00:26:36,062 --> 00:26:37,897 Oh, you think Harry Potter's stupid? No. 674 00:26:37,930 --> 00:26:40,166 I think that when people say they're Ravenclaw, 675 00:26:40,199 --> 00:26:41,668 they really think that they're Gryffindor 676 00:26:41,701 --> 00:26:43,335 but they don't want to sound too braggy. 677 00:26:43,369 --> 00:26:46,873 Okay, wow. So you've seen one of the movies. Cool. 678 00:26:46,906 --> 00:26:48,641 No, I've read all the books. 679 00:26:48,675 --> 00:26:49,909 I had mono in college 680 00:26:49,942 --> 00:26:51,377 and my weird theater-major roommate had them, 681 00:26:51,410 --> 00:26:53,045 and I read them in a week. 682 00:26:53,079 --> 00:26:54,647 And? 683 00:26:55,682 --> 00:26:58,651 And I... 684 00:26:58,685 --> 00:27:01,153 think they are modern classics. 685 00:27:01,187 --> 00:27:03,089 Okay? There you go. 686 00:27:03,122 --> 00:27:05,658 You happy now? You've got something on me. 687 00:27:05,692 --> 00:27:08,728 The tough boss likes a child wizard book. 688 00:27:08,761 --> 00:27:10,329 There you go. Spread the news. 689 00:27:10,362 --> 00:27:13,299 I mean, actually, I think it's kind of nice. 690 00:27:13,332 --> 00:27:15,401 It almost makes you seem human. 691 00:27:15,434 --> 00:27:17,169 Don't be a dick. 692 00:27:17,203 --> 00:27:18,838 (chuckles) 693 00:27:20,707 --> 00:27:22,074 (sighs) 694 00:27:32,819 --> 00:27:33,820 Can I sit down? 695 00:27:33,853 --> 00:27:35,121 What are you doing here? 696 00:27:35,154 --> 00:27:37,356 Darryl was hoping we could talk. 697 00:27:37,389 --> 00:27:38,725 Face-to-face. 698 00:27:38,758 --> 00:27:40,359 Darryl was hoping? 699 00:27:40,392 --> 00:27:41,861 He just called me. 700 00:27:41,894 --> 00:27:44,964 He wanted us to talk and... so do I. 701 00:27:44,997 --> 00:27:47,033 (exhales): Oh, my. 702 00:27:47,066 --> 00:27:49,068 Paula... 703 00:27:49,101 --> 00:27:51,938 I've been giving you some space, but... 704 00:27:51,971 --> 00:27:53,873 I can't do this anymore. 705 00:27:53,906 --> 00:27:55,775 I've apologized every way I can think of. 706 00:27:55,808 --> 00:27:58,377 It was the biggest mistake of my life. 707 00:27:59,779 --> 00:28:02,181 You are the center of my whole universe. 708 00:28:04,350 --> 00:28:06,352 Please give me another chance. 709 00:28:10,790 --> 00:28:12,224 Oh, God, Darryl. 710 00:28:12,258 --> 00:28:13,760 Get in here. 711 00:28:16,162 --> 00:28:19,131 What did you do? 712 00:28:19,165 --> 00:28:20,833 Well, I said I was going to the bathroom, 713 00:28:20,867 --> 00:28:21,901 but instead, I called Scott 714 00:28:21,934 --> 00:28:24,003 on the phone and had him come here. 715 00:28:24,036 --> 00:28:25,271 And then I peed. 716 00:28:25,304 --> 00:28:28,307 I know what you literally did... 717 00:28:29,408 --> 00:28:30,476 ...you dumb-ass. 718 00:28:30,509 --> 00:28:35,014 What I want to know is how you could do this to me. 719 00:28:35,047 --> 00:28:36,749 This is my life, Darryl. 720 00:28:36,783 --> 00:28:38,851 This is not some secret trick. 721 00:28:38,885 --> 00:28:40,887 I wanted to help you; you're my best friend. 722 00:28:40,920 --> 00:28:44,190 Will you stop saying that. 723 00:28:44,223 --> 00:28:47,994 I am not your best friend. 724 00:29:00,907 --> 00:29:03,475 REBECCA (muffled): Okay. Okay, fine. 725 00:29:03,509 --> 00:29:05,244 Maybe I'm a little bit Gryffindor. 726 00:29:05,277 --> 00:29:07,914 Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 727 00:29:07,947 --> 00:29:09,916 Oh, but you're totally a Slytherin. 728 00:29:09,949 --> 00:29:11,818 I'm not ashamed of that. 729 00:29:11,851 --> 00:29:14,921 Slytherin are proud, cunning, ambitious. 730 00:29:14,954 --> 00:29:16,288 And evil. 731 00:29:16,322 --> 00:29:18,524 Which actually totally fits you. 732 00:29:18,557 --> 00:29:21,828 Because you tried to seduce me even though I'm engaged. 733 00:29:21,861 --> 00:29:23,162 Oh, don't do that. 734 00:29:23,195 --> 00:29:24,330 You're bored in your relationship, 735 00:29:24,363 --> 00:29:25,331 but that's not my fault. 736 00:29:25,364 --> 00:29:31,470 Anyway, I am completely and totally free... 737 00:29:31,503 --> 00:29:35,507 to do whatever I want with whomever I want. 738 00:29:37,509 --> 00:29:39,145 Don't you miss that? 739 00:29:39,178 --> 00:29:42,514 Miss the pursuit? 740 00:29:42,548 --> 00:29:44,316 No. 741 00:29:44,350 --> 00:29:46,886 No. I never cared for the chase. 742 00:29:46,919 --> 00:29:48,921 Really? 743 00:29:48,955 --> 00:29:52,258 To never be with anyone else. 744 00:29:52,291 --> 00:29:55,194 To never have another first time 745 00:29:55,227 --> 00:29:58,197 or first kiss. 746 00:29:58,230 --> 00:30:01,067 What's so magical about first kisses? 747 00:30:01,100 --> 00:30:03,335 Well, you can't be with Cedric if you're already with Ron. 748 00:30:03,369 --> 00:30:05,838 Stop talking dirty. 749 00:30:05,872 --> 00:30:08,374 (elevator rumbles) 750 00:30:08,407 --> 00:30:09,909 (elevator bell dings) 751 00:30:09,942 --> 00:30:11,844 Oh! The elevator's back on. Great. 752 00:30:11,878 --> 00:30:13,512 (clears throat) 753 00:30:13,545 --> 00:30:16,849 Yep. Great. Great. 754 00:30:16,883 --> 00:30:18,384 (clears throat) 755 00:30:18,417 --> 00:30:20,019 (clears throat) 756 00:30:21,420 --> 00:30:22,621 Oh, my God. (sighs) 757 00:30:22,654 --> 00:30:24,323 Okay, so we've been here all night. 758 00:30:24,356 --> 00:30:26,358 Wow. (sniffs) 759 00:30:36,435 --> 00:30:38,070 (elevator stops) 760 00:30:45,211 --> 00:30:47,947 (panting) 761 00:30:47,980 --> 00:30:51,117 * 762 00:30:51,150 --> 00:30:54,520 * You're looking really guilty 763 00:30:54,553 --> 00:30:55,654 Move aside. 764 00:30:55,687 --> 00:30:59,558 * You can't push the wind 765 00:30:59,591 --> 00:31:01,160 Oh, you. 766 00:31:01,193 --> 00:31:03,395 That kiss was all your fault. 767 00:31:03,429 --> 00:31:05,631 * I just reveal your 768 00:31:05,664 --> 00:31:07,499 * Deepest wishes and fears 769 00:31:07,533 --> 00:31:09,101 * So it's you, Rebecca 770 00:31:09,135 --> 00:31:11,137 * It's not me 771 00:31:11,170 --> 00:31:14,373 * Who is super weird 772 00:31:15,574 --> 00:31:19,278 * Super weird 773 00:31:19,311 --> 00:31:20,646 * You're super weird 774 00:31:20,679 --> 00:31:22,915 No, I'm not! 775 00:31:22,949 --> 00:31:25,184 Get away from me! Go back to Santa Ana! 776 00:31:25,217 --> 00:31:26,652 Or I don't know if that's where you're from 777 00:31:26,685 --> 00:31:28,287 or that's where you're going. 778 00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:30,522 * You ruined everything 779 00:31:32,058 --> 00:31:35,661 * You stupid bitch. 780 00:31:35,694 --> 00:31:37,163 (magical tinkling) 781 00:31:38,664 --> 00:31:40,933 No. Get away from me, Mr. Wind! 782 00:31:40,967 --> 00:31:43,102 Just get away! Stop bothering me, wind! 783 00:31:43,135 --> 00:31:44,636 Just stop it! 784 00:31:47,106 --> 00:31:49,075 Hey. Hey, hey, hey. 785 00:31:49,108 --> 00:31:50,476 Hey, Josh. Hey, wake up. 786 00:31:50,509 --> 00:31:52,411 Wake up. I got to talk to you. It's really important. 787 00:31:52,444 --> 00:31:54,480 Oh, yeah. What-What's up? Everything okay? 788 00:31:54,513 --> 00:31:56,348 Where have you been? It's so early. 789 00:31:56,382 --> 00:31:57,549 I have to tell you something, okay? 790 00:31:57,583 --> 00:31:59,085 I have to tell you something right now. 791 00:31:59,118 --> 00:32:00,652 What is it? 792 00:32:07,026 --> 00:32:09,996 (grunts, sighs) 793 00:32:10,029 --> 00:32:12,464 So, what is it? What do you need to tell me? 794 00:32:12,498 --> 00:32:14,566 I have the most amazing news. 795 00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:15,968 Okay. What? 796 00:32:16,002 --> 00:32:17,303 Your dream is coming true. 797 00:32:17,336 --> 00:32:20,206 (gasps) Are they doing a remake of Chuck Norris's Sidekick? 798 00:32:20,239 --> 00:32:22,674 I don't think s... I mean, they might be. 799 00:32:22,708 --> 00:32:25,477 No, no, no. Josh, so I called your dream wedding venue, 800 00:32:25,511 --> 00:32:27,479 and a spot opened up! 801 00:32:27,513 --> 00:32:29,348 Hello. Is this Ashley Jones? 802 00:32:29,381 --> 00:32:30,749 Yes, are you getting married at 803 00:32:30,782 --> 00:32:33,319 the Malibu Cliffs Villa and Spa in two weeks? 804 00:32:33,352 --> 00:32:35,354 Uh, you hashtagged the venue on your Instagram. 805 00:32:35,387 --> 00:32:36,488 Incidentally, your account is not private. 806 00:32:36,522 --> 00:32:38,257 Might want to change that. Lot of weirdos out there. 807 00:32:38,290 --> 00:32:40,026 Listen, I was wondering if I could pay you 808 00:32:40,059 --> 00:32:42,761 an exorbitant amount of money to move your wedding date. 809 00:32:42,794 --> 00:32:45,564 I mean, they called me. The-the wedding venue called me, 810 00:32:45,597 --> 00:32:47,399 and-and we got off the waiting list. 811 00:32:47,433 --> 00:32:48,700 Whoa! 812 00:32:48,734 --> 00:32:52,104 When is it? What's the date? Like, next year? 813 00:32:52,138 --> 00:32:53,639 It's not next year. Uh-huh. 814 00:32:53,672 --> 00:32:54,640 It's not next month. 815 00:32:54,673 --> 00:32:55,641 Uh-huh. 816 00:32:55,674 --> 00:32:57,776 It's not next week. 817 00:32:57,809 --> 00:33:00,446 It's the week after next week. 818 00:33:00,479 --> 00:33:02,181 Huh? 819 00:33:02,214 --> 00:33:04,083 It's in two weeks! (squeals) 820 00:33:04,116 --> 00:33:05,651 The wedding is in two weeks! 821 00:33:05,684 --> 00:33:07,319 I know it's a little soon, 822 00:33:07,353 --> 00:33:10,389 but, I mean, it's the only way our dream could come true. 823 00:33:10,422 --> 00:33:13,792 (sighs) Rebecca, two-two weeks is insane. 824 00:33:13,825 --> 00:33:16,262 I know, I know. You know, that's what I told them on the phone. 825 00:33:16,295 --> 00:33:17,629 But then I-I thought about it, Josh, 826 00:33:17,663 --> 00:33:20,566 and we've known each other for 11 years. 827 00:33:20,599 --> 00:33:23,135 Finally, it's coming to an end. 828 00:33:23,169 --> 00:33:26,272 The pursuit is over, and I just want to celebrate that. 829 00:33:26,305 --> 00:33:28,074 But why the rush? 830 00:33:28,107 --> 00:33:29,608 You know, it's not a rush though. 831 00:33:29,641 --> 00:33:31,243 Because I thought about it, 832 00:33:31,277 --> 00:33:34,180 and was it a rush for you to propose to me? 833 00:33:34,213 --> 00:33:36,115 No. It's not a rush 834 00:33:36,148 --> 00:33:38,517 because I've been waiting my whole life for you. 835 00:33:38,550 --> 00:33:40,519 But there's so much to do. 836 00:33:40,552 --> 00:33:44,323 I mean, Jayma planned her wedding for a year and a half. 837 00:33:44,356 --> 00:33:46,225 And that's what's great about this. 838 00:33:46,258 --> 00:33:47,693 We plan it, we get it done, 839 00:33:47,726 --> 00:33:50,162 and then we start our lives together. 840 00:33:50,196 --> 00:33:51,797 You won't have to do anything. 841 00:33:51,830 --> 00:33:53,699 Okay? I'll handle it all. 842 00:33:53,732 --> 00:33:55,601 All you have to do is show up 843 00:33:55,634 --> 00:33:58,837 and make me the happiest girl in the world, okay? 844 00:33:58,870 --> 00:34:01,107 All right. 845 00:34:01,140 --> 00:34:03,809 Yay! Oh, hooray. I-I knew you'd say "All right." 846 00:34:03,842 --> 00:34:05,211 Oh. 847 00:34:05,244 --> 00:34:06,278 (giggling) 848 00:34:06,312 --> 00:34:08,314 Oh, my God, I'm so excited. 849 00:34:08,347 --> 00:34:10,349 Oh, I have goose bumps. (magical tinkling) 850 00:34:11,617 --> 00:34:12,484 Do you hear that? 851 00:34:12,518 --> 00:34:14,086 No. 852 00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:15,754 The winds are gone. 853 00:34:15,787 --> 00:34:17,489 Isn't that awesome? 854 00:34:17,523 --> 00:34:20,292 Yes. I can breathe through my nose again. 855 00:34:20,326 --> 00:34:22,494 Oh, my God, baby, that is so sexy. 856 00:34:22,528 --> 00:34:24,230 (both moaning) Oh, yeah! 857 00:34:24,263 --> 00:34:26,198 Two weeks?! 858 00:34:26,232 --> 00:34:28,200 Because of the venue. 859 00:34:28,234 --> 00:34:29,868 You know, we got off the waiting list. 860 00:34:29,901 --> 00:34:31,470 And two weeks is actually, it's not, 861 00:34:31,503 --> 00:34:32,871 it's not as short as you think. 862 00:34:32,904 --> 00:34:36,442 In fact, the possum gestation period is two weeks. 863 00:34:36,475 --> 00:34:38,577 How do you know that? I looked it up 864 00:34:38,610 --> 00:34:40,312 before you came here so I could tell you that. 865 00:34:40,346 --> 00:34:41,780 My God, honey, that is so fast. 866 00:34:41,813 --> 00:34:44,316 I know how it looks, okay? I know that people are 867 00:34:44,350 --> 00:34:45,884 gonna think we're rushing into it, but... 868 00:34:45,917 --> 00:34:48,220 I don't know, I can't live my life worrying 869 00:34:48,254 --> 00:34:50,322 about what other people think. Who cares? 870 00:34:50,356 --> 00:34:51,657 It's my life 871 00:34:51,690 --> 00:34:53,759 and my love story. 872 00:34:53,792 --> 00:34:55,461 Right? 873 00:34:56,495 --> 00:34:58,630 Right. 874 00:34:58,664 --> 00:35:00,666 (knocking) 875 00:35:04,903 --> 00:35:06,538 Hey, guys. 876 00:35:06,572 --> 00:35:08,607 Okay, I want you to go right upstairs 877 00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:09,841 and start your homework, okay? 878 00:35:09,875 --> 00:35:11,243 We already finished all of our homework 879 00:35:11,277 --> 00:35:12,744 for the entire weekend at Dad's house. 880 00:35:12,778 --> 00:35:13,845 He made us. 881 00:35:13,879 --> 00:35:16,482 He actually watched us do it like a sadistic sadist. 882 00:35:16,515 --> 00:35:18,450 Divorced Scott sucks. 883 00:35:18,484 --> 00:35:21,487 We're not divorced! Yet. 884 00:35:23,222 --> 00:35:26,225 Do you want to stay for dinner? 885 00:35:29,228 --> 00:35:30,196 What? 886 00:35:30,229 --> 00:35:32,164 Well, I made that chili thing that you like, 887 00:35:32,198 --> 00:35:36,735 and I miss you and I love you and I want you to move back in. 888 00:35:36,768 --> 00:35:38,204 You do? 889 00:35:38,237 --> 00:35:40,472 Look, we all make mistakes. I... 890 00:35:40,506 --> 00:35:42,741 God knows I've made them. 891 00:35:42,774 --> 00:35:47,213 And... if people think I'm an idiot for taking you back, 892 00:35:47,246 --> 00:35:49,348 screw 'em. 893 00:35:49,381 --> 00:35:51,350 Aw, Paula... 894 00:35:51,383 --> 00:35:53,819 You are not totally off the hook. 895 00:35:53,852 --> 00:35:55,421 You need to earn back my trust, 896 00:35:55,454 --> 00:35:58,490 and I don't know how long that's gonna take. 897 00:35:58,524 --> 00:36:00,292 And... I-I totally understand. 898 00:36:00,326 --> 00:36:01,927 I'm ready to do the work. 899 00:36:01,960 --> 00:36:04,830 Good. 900 00:36:04,863 --> 00:36:06,732 Because I missed you. 901 00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:10,536 I've missed you, too. 902 00:36:10,569 --> 00:36:13,572 And that toilet upstairs has been running for three weeks, 903 00:36:13,605 --> 00:36:15,374 and it is driving me insane. 904 00:36:15,407 --> 00:36:18,910 So you are gonna have to... put your hand in that tank ASAP. 905 00:36:18,944 --> 00:36:21,947 Honey, I will put my hand in an unflushed toilet bowl for you. 906 00:36:21,980 --> 00:36:23,815 (exhales) Yeah, you will. 907 00:36:34,826 --> 00:36:36,595 Don't yell at me again, please. 908 00:36:36,628 --> 00:36:40,399 Darryl, I'm here to apologize. 909 00:36:40,432 --> 00:36:42,468 I know, I know. I am so sorry. 910 00:36:42,501 --> 00:36:44,736 No, I'm the one who... 911 00:36:44,770 --> 00:36:46,972 Just... 912 00:36:48,006 --> 00:36:50,409 (sighs) Darryl. Hmm? 913 00:36:50,442 --> 00:36:55,714 Thanks to your unsolicited and presumptuous interference... 914 00:36:56,915 --> 00:37:00,452 ...Scott and I are going to try and work things out. 915 00:37:00,486 --> 00:37:02,454 Oh, God, that's great! 916 00:37:02,488 --> 00:37:04,356 But you definitely overstepped. 917 00:37:06,057 --> 00:37:07,426 (sighs) But I know you meant well. 918 00:37:07,459 --> 00:37:09,628 Of course I did, because I care. 919 00:37:09,661 --> 00:37:10,829 You're my best friend. 920 00:37:10,862 --> 00:37:12,631 I know, I know. 921 00:37:12,664 --> 00:37:15,634 I'm not your best friend. Please, just don't say it. 922 00:37:15,667 --> 00:37:17,903 'Cause I think I've always known it. 923 00:37:17,936 --> 00:37:20,005 But the truth is... 924 00:37:20,038 --> 00:37:21,973 I don't really care. 925 00:37:22,007 --> 00:37:23,775 'Cause you make me happy. 926 00:37:23,809 --> 00:37:25,644 I do? Yes. 927 00:37:25,677 --> 00:37:26,978 Every day, when I come to work, 928 00:37:27,012 --> 00:37:29,515 you have the perfect sarcastic remark 929 00:37:29,548 --> 00:37:31,517 or a great insight into a case. 930 00:37:31,550 --> 00:37:33,819 And you always tell me the truth, no matter what. 931 00:37:33,852 --> 00:37:35,387 And I like those things so much 932 00:37:35,421 --> 00:37:37,456 that I don't care where I rank with you. 933 00:37:37,489 --> 00:37:39,591 But... No. Shush. 934 00:37:39,625 --> 00:37:41,627 Let me finish. 935 00:37:43,495 --> 00:37:45,497 * 936 00:37:53,572 --> 00:37:55,073 * You're my best friend 937 00:37:55,106 --> 00:37:56,808 * And I know I'm not yours 938 00:37:56,842 --> 00:37:58,444 * And that's okay 939 00:38:00,379 --> 00:38:02,348 * I'm not your best friend 940 00:38:02,381 --> 00:38:03,882 * Of that I'm pretty sure 941 00:38:03,915 --> 00:38:05,917 * But I'm okay 942 00:38:08,119 --> 00:38:11,790 * Friendship doesn't have to be a two-way street * 943 00:38:11,823 --> 00:38:15,561 * As long as there's a car on the road * 944 00:38:15,594 --> 00:38:18,764 * Friendship doesn't have to mean a shoulder to cry on * 945 00:38:18,797 --> 00:38:20,999 * I don't need a shoulder to cry * 946 00:38:21,032 --> 00:38:23,602 Oh, I'm just kidding! 947 00:38:23,635 --> 00:38:25,871 * You're my best friend 948 00:38:25,904 --> 00:38:27,339 * And I know I'm not yours 949 00:38:27,373 --> 00:38:29,007 * And that's okay 950 00:38:31,477 --> 00:38:34,513 * Your best friend is somebody else * 951 00:38:34,546 --> 00:38:36,348 * But I get it 952 00:38:36,382 --> 00:38:37,483 * Completely get it 953 00:38:37,516 --> 00:38:39,585 * A little from you 954 00:38:39,618 --> 00:38:41,720 * Is like a lot from someone else * 955 00:38:41,753 --> 00:38:45,056 * Six of yours beats anyone's dozen * 956 00:38:45,090 --> 00:38:48,660 * That's why I love you like a sister * 957 00:38:48,694 --> 00:38:50,996 * And you love me like 958 00:38:51,029 --> 00:38:53,899 * A second cousin 959 00:38:53,932 --> 00:38:57,369 * You're my best friend and I know I'm not yours * 960 00:38:57,403 --> 00:38:58,670 * And that's okay 961 00:39:00,672 --> 00:39:02,408 * That's okay 962 00:39:04,410 --> 00:39:06,512 * I said it's okay. 963 00:39:06,545 --> 00:39:08,614 Really. 964 00:39:09,615 --> 00:39:11,583 Okay, tell you what. Hmm? 965 00:39:11,617 --> 00:39:15,387 You're my best... male friend. 966 00:39:15,421 --> 00:39:17,756 That's cool. 967 00:39:17,789 --> 00:39:19,458 Cool. 968 00:39:19,491 --> 00:39:21,660 DARRYL (in distance): I'm her best male friend! 969 00:39:26,665 --> 00:39:27,899 (clears throat) 970 00:39:27,933 --> 00:39:29,901 Hey. 971 00:39:29,935 --> 00:39:31,537 How was your weekend? 972 00:39:31,570 --> 00:39:32,638 Good. You? 973 00:39:32,671 --> 00:39:33,905 Wonderful. 974 00:39:33,939 --> 00:39:36,908 Okay, so we need to clear the air. 975 00:39:36,942 --> 00:39:38,544 Um... 976 00:39:38,577 --> 00:39:40,812 last week... 977 00:39:40,846 --> 00:39:43,549 those winds... 978 00:39:43,582 --> 00:39:47,419 I acted crazy, and then there-there was that rando kiss 979 00:39:47,453 --> 00:39:48,887 between us, but that happened, 980 00:39:48,920 --> 00:39:50,055 and it's never gonna happen again. 981 00:39:50,088 --> 00:39:51,189 Whatever you say. 982 00:39:51,222 --> 00:39:52,190 I do say. 983 00:39:52,223 --> 00:39:54,660 'Cause I just, I said it. Yeah. 984 00:39:54,693 --> 00:39:56,662 And I actually have marvelous news. 985 00:39:56,695 --> 00:39:59,097 I'm now getting married in two weeks. 986 00:39:59,130 --> 00:40:01,833 Wow. Okay. 987 00:40:01,867 --> 00:40:03,435 To who? 988 00:40:04,570 --> 00:40:06,805 You're so funny. 989 00:40:06,838 --> 00:40:09,475 Have fun with the Muggle. 990 00:40:16,748 --> 00:40:18,216 Oh. Hi, George. 991 00:40:18,249 --> 00:40:20,552 It's George. 992 00:40:21,587 --> 00:40:23,088 Do you know my name? 993 00:40:23,121 --> 00:40:24,289 Of course I do. 994 00:40:24,322 --> 00:40:26,892 You finally made an impression with that elevator thing. 995 00:40:26,925 --> 00:40:29,628 I asked around, and no one seemed to know your name either, 996 00:40:29,661 --> 00:40:32,063 so then I looked you up. 997 00:40:32,097 --> 00:40:33,732 Wow. 998 00:40:33,765 --> 00:40:34,833 That's thoughtful. 999 00:40:34,866 --> 00:40:36,101 Mm. 1000 00:40:36,134 --> 00:40:38,604 And I am sorry, by the way, about all the-- 1001 00:40:38,637 --> 00:40:40,005 I was triggered. 1002 00:40:40,038 --> 00:40:41,840 And then the Devil Winds, also. 1003 00:40:41,873 --> 00:40:42,941 Those came in. 1004 00:40:42,974 --> 00:40:46,945 And then I was... I was worried you might be upset. 1005 00:40:46,978 --> 00:40:48,246 (chuckles) 1006 00:40:48,279 --> 00:40:50,916 I'm not upset. 1007 00:40:50,949 --> 00:40:54,986 But you are fired again, George. 1008 00:40:55,020 --> 00:40:57,022 Like, seriously fired this time. 1009 00:40:59,758 --> 00:41:01,760 He knows my name. 1010 00:41:05,163 --> 00:41:06,131 (phone rings) Hello? 1011 00:41:06,164 --> 00:41:07,899 MAN: An inmate is calling from San Quentin. 1012 00:41:07,933 --> 00:41:09,601 Will you accept the charges? Yes. 1013 00:41:09,635 --> 00:41:11,537 Yes, of course. 1014 00:41:11,570 --> 00:41:13,271 Marcus. How are you, darling? 1015 00:41:13,304 --> 00:41:14,673 How is your gang? 1016 00:41:14,706 --> 00:41:16,575 Oh, before you say anything, 1017 00:41:16,608 --> 00:41:19,511 I'm so sorry that I haven't been able to visit. 1018 00:41:19,545 --> 00:41:22,180 I-I've been so busy with Long John Slither's... 1019 00:41:22,213 --> 00:41:26,618 Well, of course I still care about you. 1020 00:41:26,652 --> 00:41:30,288 Honey, I love both you and Long John equally. 1021 00:41:30,321 --> 00:41:33,024 You can't expect me to... 1022 00:41:33,058 --> 00:41:35,594 You want me to choose? 1023 00:41:35,627 --> 00:41:38,797 Please... (stammers) I can't do that. 1024 00:41:41,266 --> 00:41:43,902 * 1025 00:41:43,935 --> 00:41:48,039 * What's a girl to do when she's stuck between men? * 1026 00:41:48,073 --> 00:41:51,176 * Especially when one of the men is a snake. * 1027 00:41:51,209 --> 00:41:52,477 Captioning sponsored by CBS 1028 00:41:52,510 --> 00:41:54,813 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org